The tractor at Fort Awesome.

GRILL: (mine)

BECAUSE WHAT WE NEED IS...one more distraction behind the wheel. Having said that, bow howdy!

MONSTER OF THE DEEP: Well it's not one of the big guys, but a team of researchers have finally captured footage of a giant squid for the first time. Nifty.

THIS IS RELEVANT TO MY INTERESTS: Because old-school is how thenanigans rolls. Cursive biatches.

EYEBALL: 

(mine)

WRAP IT UP FELLAS: Because the shiat is getting serious all up in and around  and down there. 

HEADS WILL EXPLODE: The times, they are a changin'. It's only a matter of time before this is the norm.

JUST SO WE'RE CLEAR: You are, in fact, not in good hands.

DETAIL:

(mine)

DOGGIE-DO OF THE DAY: This. Right here. Applause.

HELPFUL RULE OF THE DAY: Unless you are sweating your balls off putting more time in at the gym than an elite NFL athlete, stay away from the sports drinks. Especially huge quantities of them.

I SEE DUMB PEOPLE: And I point and laugh. Chester would NOT be impressed.

MODEL #:

(mine)