The Sarcastic Fringehead does not approve.

 HITCHING A RIDE WITH MAMA: (source)

STFU OF THE DAY: Anytime you hear any politician or economist or pundit or asshat blathering on about austerity measures, tell them to toss off. 

SWORD STORIES: There are two kinds of people in this world. Those people who don't own swords, and guys like this. *

SUIT UP FELLAS! There is hope! I get a kick out of this story. I hope these gents know about this site. You do, don't you?

UGLY-ASS FISH OF THE DAY: Introducing the Sarcastic Fringehead.

Oh nature, you SO scary. Wait tip you see what this guy does with his mouth.

POW! Right in the kisser. Apparently our hands evolved for a purpose. No, not that one. That's just a bonus.

WATCH YOUR LANGUAGE AROUND THE LITTLE ONES: And by little ones, I mean really, really little ones.

YOUR ON-LINE PRIVACY: These are the companies that are selling you out (from sort of kind of to totally) on the interwebs. Yes, you know these companies.

WORD:

(source)

OFFERED WITHOUT COMMENT: Medical marijuana is not just something that drives the Cheetos economy.

BOLD FACED RACISM...is alive and well and thriving in Delaware. Wow. I wonder where else this is happening? I'd like to be positive and hope that this is a one-off kind of situation but I just can't.

WANKER: Just so we're clear, I'm not referring to the scribe. He gets a standing O.

WE RECOMMEND MANATEE OR CADET BLUE:

(source)

MAN'S REAL BEST FRIEND? At least the puss put in the effort.

THEN THERE'S THIS: Excuse me for a moment, is it dusty in here or what? I need a tissue.

UTAH: At least there's one state more backwards than thenanigans'.

NOT ONE FECK SHALL BE GIVEN: That was some party.

(source)

* Once upon a time there lived the greatest morning show ever. Long live The Pete and Joe show. Sword Stories has been brazenly stolen from them in tribute.