CAT GOT ITS TONGUE : (source)
THE MOST EXPENSIVE PHOTO OP EVER: Also the most embarrassing. There is so much I want to say about this whole thing but for once, I'm going to clam up.
FREEDOM OF RELIGION: But not freedom from it.
MEANWHILE...this. 5th paragraph. You can't really make this up. Once upon a time you could because, you know, that kind of stuff happened all the time. But now? We really should be way past this.
Secretary Bird is stylin' some sweet blinker accessories.
I HATE PEOPLE: This is just one reason why.
LESS GIVING, MORE LIVING: This cannot possibly be a good thing. Sigh.
EVEL KNIEVEL IS ROLLING IN HIS GRAVE: Good luck with this pal.
IF AT FIRST YOU DON'T SUCCEED: Try, try again. I'm surprised this didn't happen in my town, where car vs. buildings happen all the time.
AMERICA THE PLUTOCRACY: By the looks of things, we're already there.
CONSEQUENCES: Our gun culture.